Relationship Talk With Bukky: My wife of 10 years hits me every time; I still love her

I cannot control her again. She so hates my family, especially my mother.  Even her own family, she doesn’t want to see anybody.

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  • Bukky Sanni
Women are also perpetrators of domestic violence.playWomen are also perpetrators of domestic violence.

 (Mbarrara Sun)

Dear Bukky,

I really need your advice on this

My wife is not making me happy. We have been married for over 10years now with 2 kids – a 10-year-old boy and a 5-year-old girl. We always engage in fights, at least three times a week and we have been on this since we got married.

I cannot control her again. She so hates my family, especially my mother.  Even her own family, she doesn’t want to see anybody. She is also violent. Whenever we are having any issue she always slaps my face. She has done this so much that I can no longer count but I she guess doesn’t want the marriage again .But I still love her.

Please your advice is needed.
___________

Dear reader,

I think it’s a good thing that she does not want the marriage again. It should help you get out of it easily, too. Because, frankly, that is what I would advise you to do.

In my opinion, every issue is workable in a relationship and everyone who intends to stay in a relationship or marriage should understand this. Patience and forbearance to try out every form of reconciliation is something every couple should know because there will be need for it in their relationships. Knowing how to settle disputes is important.

Being patient enough for reconciliation is also necessary but that does not apply to cases of domestic violence.

Ten years of bearing abuse from your wife is long enough. You didn’t have to wait that long, really. I think you are allowed and even justified if you ask for a divorce now. Whatever you think you feel for her is not as important as your safety.

If the slaps do not graduate into more life-threatening assaults, it could be you who would become too provoked one day to the extent of doing something really violent to her. You really don’t have to wait till this is the case.

Get out as fast as you can. Your kids will be fine. What people will say do not matter either. That marriage is a potential fatality that needs to be curbed now that you still have the opportunity.
___________

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